i've been places, and i've done things. some i'm proud of, some i wish could be undone. but all things work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His will (Romans 8:28) and i know He's takin' me places.
well let's see. today was a pizza of suckiness topped with love, to make it taste better.
the pizza base: (i only had 4 hours of sleep due to planning for the games.) 1) tense music prac 2) sucky haircut PLUS. they made me wait super long, causing me to get ultra anxious cos i was afraid i'd be late for soundcheck PLUS some woman spoke to me in chinese asking me things i didn't understand so i just said "uh can anything" and she put some serum in my hair which cost me 15 dollaroos. STUPID. i don't like my hair now. it's not much of a difference but even the slight difference is enough to make me wanna sue them. UGLY. 3) prayer was distracting cos i couldn't hear myself and someone FURTHER lowered my keyboard so i couldn't hear and all i heard was baby and lukie. 4) games was a complete and total flop. they all looked gong and bored out of their wits and i didn't know how to psyche up the crowd. 5) worship was technically horrible but spritually good. my aux gave way and i had NO sound. me and lukie. but lukie's more experienced so i think he was ok, but i was freaking out. as if being the only pianist was not bad enough, i had to be the only pianist with no aux. 6) after all this, i still had to get up on stage and emcee. which was horrid cos it was boring. and if i felt bored by myself, what more the people?
after that, my pizza of rottenness became unrotten because of the following people: gaius, char, lukie, benji (!) , dawnie, millicent, chuan and ness (your message lit up my day although i didn't even tell you how bad my day was), aunty AL, and last but DEFINATELY not the least, GOD! :)
Lord, You took my suckiness away through people and also the worship at the end. seeing the girls the way they were certainly touched my heart and brought tears, happy tears, to my eyes. I LOVE YOU LORD! and even if my day sucked, i thank You for helping me remember to worship You and to praise You still. You're awesome. absolutely awesome. and even if tomorrow's service will have lesser youths and less of my best friends, i WILL worship You with everything within me, and i'll give You beyond 100% cos it's all about You :) kisses!
GAIUS: you were my strength la, sweetheart. thank you for your encouragement and it helped to have your arms when i was down the way i was. i know we always fight and quarrel and ignore each other and stupid things like that, but i want you to know that i love you and that after the whole long way we've come, i know there's so many more decades of fun and idiosyncrasies in store for us. (i've already known you for more than one and a half decades, if you've realized). through it all, you still rock!
CHAR: hey babe, thank you! i'm so glad we've gotten closer this year. i thank God we're still in the running together and i love you la. your hugs, your grace-kellys, your whacks on my sort-of-butt, your smiles, your grunts, your eeee-diots and more, all mean alot to me and you're so so precious la. cheer up, and you're amazing huns!
LUKIE: hey boy, i miss you la! we used to eat lunch and dinner and almost every weekend meal together. now you're busy and we've got different friends, but hey, i'm still here for you and you still mean alot to me. you'll always be a korkor in my mind and i'll always be your xiao'en. hugs and love! (you boil the carrot then i will eat ok? otherwise i'm sticking to hot dogs. haha)
BENJI: (i'll give you my love on a piece of paper!)
DAWNIE: hey gorgeous who can't take pictures with her eyes open until after 3 tries.. I LOVE YOU! haha. you're the ultimate ruler of sotong-ness, but you're still my bestie! we MUST hang out soon and i'm missing out on so much of your life so can you please make time for me? :) haha. love love love love love love, even if you whine and have occassionally smelly feet :) hee! you can whine to me ok? i can tahan your nuances, in fact, i'd be a pleasure! i'm your happy cake! if you need a sugar rush of chocolates or anything, i'm your girl! i'll get some to make you happy and i'll take pictures with you until we get the perfect ones! and i'll cover for you if you can't play that week, and i'll watch your back and try not to let you get hurt, i'll kill whoever makes you cry. i love you!
MILLICENT: girl, you've grown so much! thank you for sitting with me and for caring for me, and for remembering the little things i've done for you. i still believe that i'll succeed in getting you to return my hug someday soon! you really have so much potential in you to love and care for others, don't hide that ok? you're gonna be an amazing soundwoman, just keep practicing and don't be afraid to take control of the soundboard, it's all yours! i love you milli!!
CHUAN: hey big, tao, egocentric, male, olderbrother person! you take care of yourself and sleep more can? otherwise you can skip away from NS with "biggest-eye-bags-used-to-hide-ammo" award. want? haha. don't wear yourself down.. and, God will make a way la huh? God's on your side and He'll definately not push you beyond your limits, and i'm here if you ever need anything! hugs and love! and don't ever let your male-pride get you so bogged down with keeping your negative emotions a secret ok? you have friends (like your twin and your cell and me and aikey and a gazillion others) who'll listen and not mock you so talk more! it works! and sean's your baby, you better make sure he gets his good results :)
NESS: baby baby baby you are so beautiful to me! :) don't worry about how you look, you look perfectly alright. and so do i! yay! anyway babesy, i just want you to know i'm here for you to whine to (i know you want to whine to someone. here's me who'll never tire of hearing his name from your lips) and really, if there's anything, i'm here! no matter what happens, i'll be here for you and i'll but portugese egg tarts to make you happy! and i'll stuff you with munchy donuts, and we'll eat good food together, we'll shop together, we'll tan together, we'll grow old together, we'll go grocery shopping together, we'll shop for baby clothes together, i'll be your brides'maid and you'll be mine! I LOVE YOU DEEP DEEP WIDE WIDE MUCH MUCH ALOT ALOT!
OKAY. yes. this is love feast, mega. again. i'm in a very lovey-dovey mood. i shall indulge my love on zaza and benji. haha. yay!