sentosa today :D
i sprang up at 7.30 A.M. and pranced around. then i gave Queks a wake up call. and then i suddenly felt very drained so i fell back into bed and didn't wake up till i don't know what time. rush rush and had a nice lil' sleepy train ride and then we were the earliest. hahah.
we popped by starbucks cos i needed coffee to wake up and he felt like spending money. what kind of reason is that?!??! "i feel like spending money." SIAO AH. you can give me a blank check :) walk walk walk then ended up at top man, sean came too, then walk walk walk then end up at dunno where then char came then we began waiting around and being stupid for two hours and we finally gathered a group of eleven and went off to the beach :)))
the sun played hide-and-seek with us today. but i got a lil bit of a tan/burn. more red than tanned, actually.
so sentosa today was:
-tanning
-reading
-basket ball
-volley ball
-sitting around and talking
-digging holes
-burying aiken
-being ogled at by ____
-staring at ____
fun, all in all :) we should do something like this again next week. but it's so tiring. surprisingly, tiring. carl's jr for dinner, as usual :) haha. and then most of us left cos we were all so spent. a good day normally leaves me spent. like today.
but yeah. i got home and my day was ruined. abso-friggin'-lutely ruined. it's amazing what a simple phone call can do. it's true when they say your tongue holds great power, to kill, to destroy, to hurt, to tear down, to manipulate, to wreck, to conquer.
the tone of your voice killed me.
you don't even know.
the way you speak, the words you use.
i'm a lit student, diction and tone is everything to me.
i analyze stuff like that. i was born to do it. don't you see?
somehow, nothing i ever do can satisfy you.
and so now, you realize, i don't even bother.
i'm too tired. too used. too numbed.
to care. to bother. to try.
i still love you.
but it really seems that this. is. not. working. out.
i hate it.
this ain't the way i imagined love to be.
if this is love, when i get married, i won't have kids.
as much as i love them.
cos if this is the result, it's not worth the crap.
screaming out my anger, screaming out my pain. yelling in the silence, death in the wind vane.thank you BFF and chuan.
;) i'll be ok. as always.
and one last thing.
i love you (s).
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and on a side note, it's 12.30A.M. now, i'm done transposing stuff and i'm in the middle of packing up my blasted room. i did NOT realize that it was this retarded and yeah okay, i'm tired. but i can't stop half way cos then my room would just look ridiculous.
i think i'm going to be nice and am actually going to wake up early tomorrow (or today, to be specific) and i'll actually go for breakfast with the father 1) to save ka-chings 2) to be nice and give him a chance to apologise (he'll NEVER apologise. he has never done so in all my life. he's too proud. DAMN MALE STINKIN' PRIDE.)
i'm still pissed. slightly. but i'm not one to hold a grudge.
OH!! and i am completely (almost) agenda-less for tomorrow :(((((((((( such a waste of a brilliant week. i think i'll grab John Grisham by the brain stem and sit him with me by the poolside with soft Nat King Cole in my ears.
OH!!! and i have a date with the class next week :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) i can't wait! i miss the fools already. dinner and then a day at the park :D how apt and totally brainless.
OH!!!!! and i have i mentioned? i hate cleaning up my room.