everything i've placed as importance in my life is slowly shifting, changing. some for the better, and some for the worse. it always is a heartbreak to have others question your beliefs.

i've had alot to think about lately, and the thinking has tired me out considerably. i think about things like, where is Grace from 6 months ago? that Grace was on fire and on the ball. hardly ever slipping up, successful, determined. the Grace now is kinda, o-kay. i mean she's not bad, but she's not the best.

i've also been thinking about what YA means to me, or if it means anything at all. it is difficult to say because GoP is my life.. the people there are the ones who touch my heart, they're the ones i cry over and they're the ones who keep me around. i don't exactly know how to balance this GoP-YA scale, and few would understand how to go about it. someone help me?

there's more but eh why drag it up..

i really miss Chuan (contrary to popular belief, i do not see him often and we are not mushpots, Gabs) and its been kinda tough not being able to communicate often. and if this is the way things are now, i kinda am afraid of what things will be like when he starts school ): but we will overcome this... yes we will (: i love you, bean stalk

BMR is a depressing subject... i must finish this fast so i can spend time with my father

Grace ♥ 5:20 m.d.